Project 365: Day 82

Published April 30, 2008 by sadistickitten

Last night read more of my book (gotta make a blinkie for breast cancer and offer it in

 since I keep thinking about how it want to help out with something.  I do buy pink/breast cancer stuff to help celebrate it but still seems like I should be doing more you know?) and started a new letter to a new pal. I've been trying to get a few more pals, a few them haven't emailed me back after I asked if they want to be pals.  No biggie, there's always others that I can be pals with not a big loss specially since I don't know these people yet.

Spent today waiting for my parents to show up but of course, like always I'm still waiting.  I should call them to say thanks for calling us to say that you were coming over or something like that but why should I?  I wasn't the one to forget, they did.  I guess I'm just not as important as other people but I'm pretty used to disappointment.  I just wish that for once they'd mean it what they tell me and not just talk out of their asses.  I will call them in a bit to say that if they want to come over this week then give us plenty of time to let us know.  It's like my dad doesn't really listen to me when I talk or he just gets busy with things and the time goes away from him or something….he's a busy man, he's always doing something since he never has the time when he's working.

Ordered my mom's mother's day gift online & I have other stuff that we're giving her in storage area so this was just to add to it.  I know, why bother ordering and buying stuff for that bitch when she made you feel bad about not contacting your sister & a bunch of bs well it's simple she's my mom.  I still love her deep down even she did that stuff, she just wants everyone to be happy.  My sister well I don't love her, she's never showed me ANY love whatsoever but my mom has.  She's done several things for me before in the past.  Plus she's my mom!

I'm just emotionally exhausted from them constantly not going through what they say and turning around not calling or seeing us.  God, no wonder I'm so fucked up look at what they do to me.  They go back on their word, they lie and say they'll call, etc.  My Avon came in too so my mom needs her $ from me, so I'll just sit around waiting for them to call and say look can we come over?  *ggrr* I hate it when people waste our time.  Wtf?  

Just because Tony & I don't work (ok he works but you get my point) and we're home all the time (his job is online what do you expect he HAS to be home or he'd never get work done on his site) doesn't mean that my time isn't valuable.  I don't know why I even tell Tony that they're coming, I should rather stop bothering.  I HATE inconsiderate people.  Why do people do this to me?  WHY?  I really need to talk to them about this. Please don't tell me, Jenn you should've written that in your letter.  My parents are older, they're set in their ways, they're not going to change and I NEED to except that.  I can't keep letting myself get upset whenever they don't show up.  I need to be surprised when they do.  From now on, I will NOT believe a word that my dad says, he says he's coming over I'll just say to myself yah right & forget it.  I plan on doing that from now on.  Why do I have such terrible family members?  Am I jinx or something? Maybe I suck, heh

Well I'm off to write my letter to Colleen, take care all. 


by the sweet:


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